Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Pleasing People and Chronic Wet Blankets

I'm a people pleaser. It's innately ingrained within me. So much so, that I've taken two friends, and tried setting them up (even though I wish the guy I was setting up wanted to date me, but since he showed no interest, and was a great guy, I just want him to be happy).

I'm beginning to think this is more of a flaw than an attribute. Yes, being nice is great...but nice girls finish last as much as nice guys.

I'm not a girl who enjoys drama or conflict. I'll debate the issues of the day with you, but coming from me, it's mostly all fun...I rarely allow things to get too heated because I would hate to upset the person I am hanging out with.

I care about the people around me (period, the end).

What's wrong with going on a couple of dates with a guy, and spotting his favorite treat in the you pick it up for him to surprise him the next time you see each other?

My self esteem wasn't helped out about a month ago. I was hanging out with people I hadn't seen in years. We were sitting around a table, drinking, and I asked my high school buddies (they were all guys) Could you ever see me as being a mom? I can't believe I have a little man. One guy responded "Of course I could." WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?! I just don't get it. Does being maternal negate you from being attractive, or having guys want to date you...he was making it sound as if it wasn't a horrible thing, but if it weren't then how come I don't have guys lined up? (boy, wouldn't that be the day! haha).

Help me can this good girl land an equally good guy? Do I have to start being a bitch to get a nice guy to maintain interest?


How do you handle people that are chronic wet blankets?

Particularly, when you work with them.

There is a woman in my office, who just so happened to be at the concert last Friday...she has a severe case of Wet Blanket Syndrome. I wish I could tell her to sit and spin, but it wouldn't be professionally appropriate. She's 43, severely overweight, and thinks her poo doesn't stink. She agreed wtih me that SoCo was deliciously handsome, but after I filled her in on the happenings of the rest of the night, she responded with "My god! It was just one night..." in the snidest, most wet blanket on a cold day kind of way.

I had to sit on my hand to prevent it from bizzo slapping her (not really, but kind of...).

So what do I do? I'm guessing it would be best to just let it go. Mama always said "keep your friends close, and your enemies closer" and while this lady isn't necessarily an enemy...I wouldn't call her a friend.


Brian in Mpls said...

"One guy responded "Of course I could." WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?! I just don't get it. Does being maternal negate you from being attractive, or having guys want to date you..."

These are not mutually exclusive and I don't think that is what he was saying. I will give you this guys in the age range of 22-27 are probably a little nervous about getting involved with a woman with a child they tend to be a little young and just starting out. They will come around though or shoot for older guys.

Guy friend ratio could also be a pass marker as soon as I find out a womans friend ratio is 80+% guys I tend to

Matt said...

I tend to fall for the bitchy ones, myself.

I cant help myself...I like girls to be a bit on the sassy side.

Megkathleen said...

I just wouldn't associate with that woman - at least limit it as much as you can. I work with a woman that I swear to god is incapable of smiling and I just talk to her as little as possible. She never has anything good to say.

Alexa said...

i constantly want to hook up the boy im interested in with my friends.

it's a defense mechanism. and horrible.