Introducing...

Alaska.

A friend that I've known for fifteen years was set to get married this past weekend, and I was honored to be a part of her bridal party.

This was the first wedding I've ever participated in....I kept referring to it as my "First Rodeo."

There's something magical about weddings, especially (as I've come to know) when the person/people getting married are amazing friends, and are exploding with happiness.

By no means was the bride a "bridezilla." She did everything in her powers to make the day simple for her bridal party, and even had two professional hair and makeup artists come to her house to help beautify us.

The wedding party was a biggie. Six bridesmaids, six groomsmen, a junior bridesmaid, and two ushers.

I was the only "single" bridesmaid.

I had zero intentions on scoping out for a guy the night of her wedding. I pretty much knew everyone in attendance (or so I thought)...I mean, I've known the bride since I was in fifth grade, and the couple have been dating for almost eight years. I had EVERY intention on tearing up the dance floor, laughing, and having a great time. Immediately following the 25 minute ceremony, the girls and I headed to a hotel room to partake in a few shots while the the bride and groom were in the receiving line.

The drinks were flowing. Laughs were being had...exactly like I had planned.

I was mostly familiar with the groomsmen. Three of the guys went to college with the groom (two of which flew in from out of town), and played hockey together while in school. Two of the guys were brothers of the groom, and the last guy was a high school friend (who was dating someone I know).

Our table was a large oval, which was pretty cool because that allowed us to talk with one another, instead of having a super long table. Alaska was two seats away. He was tall, quiet, and had amazing blue eyes. (I was smitten from the moment I had re-introduced myself the night before at the rehearsal dinner, I digress). Someone in the bridal party asked Alaska if he was single....and to my surprise he was. At that moment I'm pretty sure I did one of two things:

1. dropped my jaw due to my complete surprise
2. was overcome with a nervous smile because my internal dialogue shouted out "YESSSSSSSSS!" quite similarly to Napoleon Dynamite
3. also couldn't stop internally repeating "oooh! You can see Russia from your front porch dontchya know?!"...Thanks Palin.

Once the music started blasting I took the dance floor with the bride. As time passed, more of us collected on the dance floor, being silly and having an all-out good time. Alaska and the hockey boys lingered on the side, sipping drinks and observing...

I couldn't let those boys stand around..so I coerced them onto the floor. Before I knew it, Alaska and I were dancing. Shortly after that, we were up in his hotel room. I know that sounds horrible...but I just couldn't help myself. He was hot. He was single. He was (mostly likely) wasted (as was I). BUT STILL!

More details to come....

Introducing...

Penny.



In the beginning of the summer I decided to play hostess, and invite people over for a BBQ. I was feeling frustrated and left out of adult activities since finding and arranging for a sitter was such a challenge. My thoughts of inviting people over were simple: No sitter needed, and everyone would know that baby boy would be involved because DUH!



The evening of the BBQ arrived and OF COURSE it rained (note: Minnesota is currently in a pretty severe drought...thanks Mother Nature for peeing on my party, I digress). The crowd was decent...about eight to ten of us...all standing outside by a small charcoal grill, gathered under five umbrellas. B$ brought two guy friends with her, which was welcomed and encouraged.



He had a quiet complexity about him. It's tough to put my finger on what exactly drew me to Penny, but consider me drawn.

We tried meeting up for coffee, but the universe was completely against us. Either he came down with bronchitis or I couldn't line up a sitter.



Penny was in a band, and was the reason I met Chi-Town (as we were out seeing his band play at the time...). The night of Penny's show, I saw a side of him that I knew wouldn't fit with me. He loves the wacky tobackie...and I'm just not that into a lifestyle that entails that. Not that it's wrong, but it's slightly inappropriate when raising children is involved (that's just my prudish two cents though).



I saw Penny over the weekend and a couple of my friends pulled me aside and said "wow...he is REALLY into you." I was a bit shocked, and didn't fully believe them. I guess he was staring at me for long periods of time...and that was enough for them to think he was into me. I thought "huh" and went along with having fun the rest of the night.

Come 1am the party made its way into the damp backyard (of course it had monsoon-ed earlier that night...and we're still in a drought...go figure) to B$'s trampoline. It was wet, and it was awesome....and I may or may not have been jumping in a dress (I was slightly intoxicated, plus the only light to expose me was that of the moon...and what better light, right?).

I hopped off of the tramp, and stood next to Penny. We brushed up next to each other a few times. Internally I was giggling.

The next thing I knew, Penny said "We're gonna take off" and with that, he was gone. If that's not a clear cut message saying "I'm just not that into you" I don't know what is.

All in all, Penny's a nice guy. No hard feelings (hahaha, no pun intended).

Introducing...

Chi-Town.

It was my second free Friday of wedding season. I had dropped baby boy off with my mother, and was faced with endless possibilities of what I could do with my free Friday night. Earlier in the day I had been overcome with a horrible migraine. The only way for me to get rid of migraines is to sleep...so sleep was option number 1.

Option 2 came in the form of seeing live music. A friend of a friend had a band that was playing at a local dive bar. I don't get a chance to hit up the local dive bar scenes, especially to see live music, very often.

I chose option 2.

The weather was eerily stormy. Minnesota is in the midst of a pretty intense drought, hence any form of precipitation completely caught me off guard.

When we walked through the doors, a man in a yellow-gold shirt caught my eye.

Tall -> Check.
Proper Hygene -> Check.
Lack of wedding ring -> Check.

Enter: his guy friend....Not gonna lie, the second I saw He was with another guy (without any girls in the picture) I jumped to the conclusion that he was Gay. Yeah, I'm going to hell and that was extremely closed minded of me...but hey, I was just doing my best to keep it real and not waste my time.

The girl I was out with, B$, immediately had her eyes on his friend (it's amazing how some things work out!).

Before long, B$, myself, and the two boys were talking. Yellow shirt was from Chicago (Chi-Town), and was a HUGE White Sox fan (I told him I was sorry to hear that..hehe). The only awkward thing about our first conversation was he immediately said "Well..I kind of have an ex, kind of not...I don't know, it's really confusing."

The boys hung out with me and B$ the rest of the night, engaging us in a couple of games of Foosball, and even helping me win a silly stuffed animal in a claw machine. They came with us to a different bar where talking was a lot easier to do. We invited them to B$'s house (which is quite out of character for us to do), and told them they could come over only if they picked up White Castle.

An hour later, they arrived at the house with White Castle in tote (it was awesome and adorable).

Soon after we were done mowing down, B$ and her beau found themselves engaged in a kiss/mini make out session (which was cool...but left me and Chi-Town in a bit of an awkward position).

I could sense the awkwardness so I did what I do best, and had us go to a different area of the house where we wouldn't have to worry about interrupting anyone. We drank, we sat, we talked.

He had been in a 5 1/2 year relationship. He had moved to Minnesota for her. She moved out on him about five months ago. He really didn't divulge too many details..and I wasn't looking for them. All I knew was it was wonderful to hang out with a guy one on one, no pressure, just good and light hearted conversation.

I hadn't mentioned my single-mom status, but referenced how I know what it's like to feel like you have baggage (referring to his mental baggage, and my "with child" baggage). He asked me to elaborate, and I'm not one to lie so I told him an abridged version of my current life situation. He sat. He listened.

I found out his age, which threw me by surprise because he was nine years older than me, but didn't look it in the least.

As the hours passed we ended up in B$'s spare bedroom (no worries, we didn't sleep together, remove any clothing...we literally were wiped out looking for a place to crash). We laid on her small twin bed, him on his back, myself on my stomach looking up at him. He was adorable. He was comfortable.

We couldn't decide if we should try to sleep in the twin bed, or try to sleep on the floor. By this time, the sun had been up for a couple of hours, and sleep was desperately needed. After moving to the floor the bed was definitely the best option. As we were about to get back onto the small bed, it happened. He went in for a kiss, and I happily obliged.

It felt amazing to feel a man's lips on mine. My head fit right into the nape of his neck. I'm not sure where his motives came from, and believe you me I've been analyzing every second of it!

• Did he kiss me out of convenience?
• Did he kiss me because he was actually interested in me?
• Did he kiss me to prove to himself that he still had it?

...I can't be too sure.

Me, being the most un-suave person I know, never managed to get his phone number. Thank god for B$, as she got his friend's name and number.

I don't know if anything will come of Chi-Town. I haven't even been pining over him like I typically do over most men that cross my path. I think I'm being realistic with him. The cards don't seem to be playing out in my favor, but I'd be darn tootin happy if he proved me wrong and made another move. A girl can only dream.

I continue...

...to survive.

I haven't been around much lately because there hasn't been much to share.

I'm still single. I'm still surviving. Sounds kind of boring, eh?

I guess a bit of new news is I've actually had a few Fridays to myself the past three weekends. See, it's wedding season in my world. In six weeks time I had/have to attend two bachelorette parties, two weddings and one bridal shower.

In the beginning of wedding season, I told my mother about the dates I would need help with baby boy. She responded by stating she would take baby boy every weekend I had a wedding event from Friday to Sunday (knowing full well that all of my wedding events aside from the wedding I'm actually in took place on a Saturday...sounds too good to be true...and it was...but I'm not here to chat about the struggles with my mom. I digress.)

In lieu of staying home on my free Friday's off, I spent time hanging out with some good friends. I crossed paths with different people, and even kissed a boy. Even with all of the freedom I was gifted I ran into the same road blocks. I haven't met a guy willing to date me.

Wah, wah..poor me!

Does anyone have any pointers for me? I need to learn how to full hearted attract the opposite sex. How can this mama bring sexy back? Is there a manual available that can guide me in the right direction?