I've been doing a bit of reflecting about whether or not I'm putting too much of my past out there for the eyes of the public to ingest. Sometimes, I worry that if I disclose too much, I will make myself an easy target should anyone I know in real life discover I am the author of such a riddled past.
I take comfort in knowing that the past is the past. I will write about it. I will embrace its facts. I will understand that it helps make me who I am today...but I will also sleep peacefully knowing I have grown from my mistakes. I have opened my eyes to red-flag situations, and I will continue to do so. I will continue to laugh as if nobody is watching. I will keep my eyes focused on reaching for the moon....because I know I'll end up amongst the stars
(and I will stop with the cheesy metaphoric quotes and sayings from here on out...maybe.)
I'm either uber paranoid...or my son is far beyond his years. I am under the impression that he resents me for not having a father figure in his life. Somehow, his actions and attitudes seem to hold a lot of frustration, and him proclaiming "nope" when I ask him to do a simple task...mirroring a teenager saying "eff you mom" through his smug little attitude. Baby Boy is living on his looks right now...but Mama is hanging on by a thread. There are so many "boy tendencies" I wish he had a father around for...
We were sitting on the couch together, watching the Amazing Race, and I busted BB playing with himself. I swear to god he had a baby boner. Think what you may, but WTF am I supposed to do about this?!?! Seriously! I didn't think boys were supposed to do this kind of stuff until they were teens...let alone in FRONT OF THEIR MOTHERS!
The kicker was, he got really upset with me when I told him NOT to touch himself. I probably handled the entire situation wrong..but seriously, I'm new at this "2.5 yo boy touching himself" thing. Do I have an overly horny toddler? Is this honestly normal? What's a single mom to do???
I'm a second away from throwing my hands in the air and shouting "I GIVE UP!"