Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Surviving Quiet Nights

My single self has been stuck in survival mode since the moment I found out I was going to be a single parent (going on three plus years). I'm starving for male attention. Hence: Single Girl Survival Mode.

I tend to spend most evenings alone. No worries, this isn't a bitch session about poor single me, it's just the facts. When you have a two year old you need to be at home, and he needs a schedule.

My friends who could keep me company fall into one of four categories categories:
1) Single but live a good drive away (and by good drive, I mean 20-30 minutes one way)
2) They live with their boyfriend/gf
3) Our friendship is more of an acquaintance, and doesn't entail hanging out one-on-one
4) All of the above

My Single Girl Survival tactics* during the week are fairly consistent:
~ Pick up my son from daycare (school, if you will)
~ Get home and try to whip up something for dinner
~ Give him a bath/put him to bed
~ Sit on the couch and mentally check out while watching horrible reality television and/or a nighttime drama
~ Go to bed to wake up the next morning, and repeat

The weekends are a WHOLE different story. I don't have a schedule, so mere chaos always seems to be looming around the next corner. My only saving grace is I've become accustomed to being alone. My son is small enough where he can't fully hold a conversation with me. Let's be real, it's going to be about 15 years before he will WANT to have an adult conversation with have to be kids.

Here's where there's a twist in my plot. I've been TRYING to date. I've been TRYING to put myself out there...and I feel like I'm suffering from the syndrome of "If you give a mouse a cookie". I've been on a few dates with a man I'll call Tall Boy (TB). It's the first time in a long time I've felt butterflies in my stomach. It's scary, exciting, and refreshing to see him. However, it's the first time I've formally dated a guy and it makes the nights I'm alone feel that much more lonely. What a catch-22, eh?

*Supplies needed for SGST include but are not limited to:
Ice Cream
Batteries for your remote
A charged cell phone
A TV Guide if you haven't memorized the weekly television lineup


Single Mom Seeking said...

I found you... because you found me through "Adam." Too funny.

Wow, you seem to be describing me, eight years ago when I had a two-year-old, alone. Amazing.

Go to the playground on the weekend. Bring snacks. Make the rounds of all your local playgrounds. This is how I met my now best friends -- single moms -- when my kid was two.

I didn't know one single mom then. Put yourself out there. Your single parent radar is "on." Invite your friends over for ice cream, let the kids play... You're on your way.

P.S. If you want anonymous bloggers to be able to comment, you might change your settings for comments. I just showed "Adam" how to do this...

So@24 said...


Here's hoping for the best! That routine you have made me sad as hell.

Meaghan said...

Do you like coffee??? Then enter my giveaway! To celebrate the launching of my very own online coffee shop I am giving away 1 pound of coffee every Friday during October. To enter visit:

To visit our website:

Megkathleen said...

I hope things work out with Tall Boy!

abrightfuture said...

Oh.....I want details on Tall Boy!

Julie said...

Honey, as a fellow single gal, my batteries are NOT for my remote. I'm just sayin. :)

Alexa said...

julie's comment cracked me up. but i'm sad cause it seems like you are in a rut, hence survival mode.

i hope you get out of it, online dating perhaps? or a new hobby? or wait, that what our blogs are supposed to be.