Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Anatomy of a Woman

(at least the women I know)

I don't know many (if any) girls my age who enjoy being single. Most of the women I know have been in a long term relationship, are living with their boyfriend, or are married. The ones who have relationships end, no matter how long or short, troll for the next guy almost immediately.

Maybe I'm jealous because dating as a single mother has been so much different that dating as a single young 20-something. Yup. That's it. I'm jealous that it's them and not me. I'm jealous that I've been patient for over four years. I've woken up 95% of my days these past four years with a smile on my face. Knowing that I'd be the only person to feed my baby, change his diapers, read to him, make him giggle. Knowing that I didn't have the shoulder to physically cry on when things got tough. Knowing it was just me.

I'm totally pms-ing right now. I can feel my intense hormones surging, but these feelings of "when is it my turn?" never subside. I survive on the hope that it will be my turn to be giddy sooner than later.

PMS aside, what brought on my surge of emotion from this astute observation? In the past few months, I've known three women to become newly single, and two of those women have met new guys or had multiple male prospects in their life. I'm happy and supportive, yes...but I want it to be my turn. I'm sick of being the cheerleader for other people's new relationships.

*Girls, if you EVER read this...you know I love you...and this post is mostly brought to you by the demons knows as P, M and S. Mwah.

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