Mid-July, while in the middle of being no-joke-broke, I checked my bank account to verify the amount of pennies I'd have available for me to go grocery shopping with; to my surprise, my account had a negative balance. During the school year, I barely scrape by from paycheck to paycheck. I have just enough money to cover my regular bills (read: mortgage, utilities, car insurance, credit cards, school lunches, groceries), with typically not a penny to spare. Enter summer time when baby boy is out of school, and I have to pay for child care....things get tighter than tight as far as money is concerned. I suppose life would be less difficult (financially speaking), if baby boy's father was in my life to help bring financial balance when childcare costs jump sky-high (but truthfully there isn't an amount of money in the world that would tempt me to subject baby boy to the drug induced life his father was living, I digress). The charge that hit my account in mid-July was my match.com subscription renewal (a mere $71...enough to waste my last remaining dollars until my next paycheck).
After the palm of my hand swiftly met my forehead in disbelief I had forgotten about my match.com subscription, my knee-jerk reaction was to immediately cancel my membership. I cancelled in hopes of receiving, at the bare minimum, $69.00 back to allow me a few dollars at the grocery store. I hopped online, and cancelled only to be met with a kind message from match.com:
"We're sorry to hear you no longer want to be a member. Please enjoy our services through the time you've paid for. As of October, your subscription will end."Eff. That was not the response I was looking for. My brain wanted to hop on the phone with member services and fight for my money back...but seeing as I had been single, without a date in what felt like years (when, in actuality, it really HAS been years), my heart stopped me. I don't often do things for myself, and by allowing my membership to stay active for a few more months, I had renewed my interest in the online dating site. I knew I'd figure out a way to feed myself and baby boy, so I left things as they were, and promptly reexamined my online profile.
We had recent professional photos taken, so I was able to add some more recent shots of myself. I also refreshed my story to be, what I thought and still think, a bit cynical. It now read:
I have no idea why I'm actually on this site. I've been single for a while; stating my reasons/justifications for being single stemming from my insane schedule (therefore not having "time" to date). The reality is this; yes, I'm very busy. I'm a solo parent (because that's what makes life the most stable for my son), I work full time, I'm studying to earn my undergrad (full time), and have a house and dog. The other part of my reality is I haven't dedicated much time to focus on me; in part because if I focus on everyone around me I don't have to pay attention to the scale. What more can I say?
Here are a few of my recent interests:
~I LOVE spending time out in my gardens; I've put in almost a dozen gardens since buying my house a year and a half ago. It's my current method of establishing peace in my life.
~My dog, rescued the week before Christmas, is a wonderful, slightly neurotic, addition to my family. Every day he makes me laugh for one reason or another.
~I recently purchased a chicken coop and plan to not only grow my own vegetables, but also eat fresh eggs from the back yard. Some people call me crazy for traveling down this path, but I'd rather be known as a chicken lady than a cat lady (no offense to cat owners out there).
~I love bbq-ing in the summer, and making feasts in the winter. I recently made a completely-from-scratch chocolate cake that (surprisingly) turned out to be quite delicious!
~I typically go camping at least once per summer; while I haven't made it out for a weekend yet, worst case scenario I'll put the tent up in the backyard and my son and I will have our own little camp-out.
If anything I've written about sounds even the slightest interesting to you, feel free to shoot me a message and say hello. The beauty (and in some ways, the craziness) of the internet is you can say hello fairly easy!
Within days of posting my fresh pictures and summary, I had activity in the form of winks and emails. I was quite tickled by the thought of men becoming intrigued by me. Knowing what I know about online dating, I knew the attention was mostly going to stay electronic...so I embraced what was coming my way, and let it entertain me while it was happening.
The first week of August, just a couple of weeks after renewing my membership, I came across a man in his late 30's. I did what I normally do when browsing photos; I checked out his bio.
- He was tall, 6'3 (which I find to be quite hot), and his one line intro read: "I seek to be content and Happy in love." (simple, refreshing and honest)
- He was from the UK (England, not the Ukraine, as he kindly reminded me the first night we met...but to let you in on a little secret, I never for a minute thought it was the Ukraine) and had spent time studying at University of London. (a man with brains...major bonus)
- He was educated (another trait I find extremely attractive), and had both a job and a car (which some might find to be trivial, but I find to be important because it states responsibility, another trait I find extremely attractive in a man).
- He enjoyed volunteering, and charity. (be still my heart)