(insert text message alert here)
"Sorry I just read your text message from Monday. Whatcha up to tonight?"
My jaw dropped, and butterflies started taking flight inside me. I had counted him out and boom, he messages.
My night was open, and plans were made.
He showed up wearing torn jeans and a rock shirt. The moment I saw him I wanted to jump him, but I held back. Back To The Future was put in the dvd player, and well before the movie ended, I was in his arms. Electricity was flying, and the chemistry between us was thick and steamy. I can't tell you the exact moment our lips first touched, but I can tell you I was floating (and simultaneously telling myself IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!). To spare feelings in lieu of him actually finding my little corner of the internet, I will tell you it got hot and heavy...and to feel even MORE juvenile I'll let it be noted that we safely made it to second base. (insert the but) As hot and heavy as we got, I held back.
I feel guarded with him. Let's review the history:
- We date a couple of years ago only to have it end kissless with an instant message.
- We reconnect five months ago only to see each other for the first time three weeks ago.
My head is damning me. How hilarious is it that things with this man went from "is he even into me" to "does he only want to have sex with me?"Is he going to shoot me a message saying he doesn't want to date?
Am I setting myself up for failure
I can't get this man, his touch, his taste and his smells, out of my head.
What do I do?
Sure, the right answer (the seemingly easy answer) would be to let it play out...wait and see how this cookie crumbles.....but the easy answer seems to be my biggest challenge.
I guess I'll force myself to do what I think will be best for me...breath in, breath out, and repeat.
P.S. I haven't been kissed, touched or held like that....ever.