Monday, May 14, 2012

Vortex of Annoyance?

Some might argue "To be or not to be" is the question.  Me?  I argue about "To sign up for a dating website, or to not sign up for a dating website."

I've done all of the dating websites a couple of times; match.com, yahoo personals, eharmony, even the free okcupid.  Not one has landed me in a substantial relationship.  Sure, I've had some mediocre to HORRIBLE dates....but the entire process felt like a waste of time.

Maybe I'm not made for online dating (?).  Maybe I just haven't had enough patience to meet "the one."  Maybe maybe maybe.....see?  I have no flipping clue what to do or how I should think about online dating.  My emotions are COMPLETELY conflicted.  Not to mention, the ridiculous commercials currently running for eharmony....I can't help but give props to their evil genius marketing group, because (yes) I want to try it out again.

What's a single-full time job holding-college student-parent to do?!  S.O.S.  I will be the first to admit I've come to terms with being single.  It's what I know.  It's kind of my bag, baby.  But I'll secretively whisper within the same breath that I really want to find a guy to date.  I refuse to give up hope that he's out there, and we just need to meet each other when the time is right and POOF!  Instant relationship is born.

Then I mentally revert back to the fact that I am OH SO TOTALLY STUCK IN MY WAYS, which, yes, I KNOW I've mentioned this already...blah blah blah.

Between school, work, single-parenting and gardening...I am confident I could set aside a few couple of nights to a romantic interest...so long as he's funny, mildly attractive, and there's a dash of chemistry...but for the love of god I am so damn torn as to how I'm going to actually get myself to a place where I can cross this goal off of my bucket list.

My love life has been trapped in a vicious cycle of annoyance.  I'm going to try to date, I give up on dating, I'm going to try online dating, I'm going to try to date (anyone know any single guys), I give up on dating...rinse, wash, repeat.

I'm all for being a spontaneous idiot, so perhaps I'll sign up tonight and see where the wind blows...then again, I have zero flattering pics of myself...so most likely I'll back out and forgetaboutit...or will I?

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