Friday, August 8, 2014

Introducing Trainer

So much to cover...where to begin?

Attention.  I'm sure I've said it a million and twelve times; as a single-solo-parent, fully employed, full time college student...I'm fairly isolated on most social aspects. when attention gets thrown my way, I'm ALL FOR IT.

Enter Trainer. Before you start saying, "Seriously, SS, WTF is wrong with you?!" hear me out.

A few (read: six) months ago, I was in a valiant exercise kick.  Still being a solid 75lbs overweight (according to those stupid BMI chart demon monster things, I digress), I was giving it the ol' college try to make it to the gym on a regular basis. 

With a full semester of courses, and a consistent 40 hour work week, placing my physical fitness above spending what miniscule "free time" I had with my son felt selfish...but it was a selfish I was comfortable being (at that point in time).  What better thing for a selfish-determined-to-drop-two-jean-sizes lady to do then sign up for a fitness challenge.  It was your run of the mill challenge with an initial weigh-in, followed by weekly weigh-ins (the person losing the highest percentage of body fat winning some FABULOUS price...yadda yadda).

The day I signed up for the challenge I recall being in a particularly snarky mood.  When I'm in said-mood, I'm not particularly mean, but I'm also not particularly nice; sarcasm typically spews out of my mouth in brilliant ways that my inner-self snickers at because (OF COURSE).  My sarcasm did not disappoint, and to my surprise I was sitting across from Trainer, a fit man with kind eyes who was approximately the same height as me, and was returned with an equal amount of whitty sarcasm.

Be still my heart.

I became the cliched "girl who has a crush on her trainer."  Eff.

I have been doing a lot of life reflecting, and between you and me, I am doing my best to be authentic, and take in all things around me.  Life is short, and you truly never know how much time you'll have on this earthy, so my recent mantra is to enjoy every damn bit of it....and enjoying him has not proven to be a difficult task.  Quite the opposite.

In the beginning of my first 90-day challenge I was a rockstar.  I'm certain a lot of it was fueled by Trainer; although I can safely say the fire burning inside me was for the most part motivation to be healthy and Trainer was just a bonus.  Unfortunately the fire wasn't strong enough to keep me going, and mid-way through I dropped out.  I was embarrassed, frustrated, annoyed with my lack of time to do everything I was trying to something had to go; and the gym was the easiest thing to cut in order to prevent an epic burnout.

About a month ago, I found a random email in my yahoo inbox from none other than Trainer.  A new challenge was on the brink of starting, and he was writing to recruit me.  Now, I'm REALLY not trying to get too far ahead of myself (yes, I've googled "does my trainer like me," and "I have a crush on my trainer," etc.), but I really DO feel a little connection with him.  However big or small that connection might FEEL, it doesn't change the fact that life is still nucking futs for me, and there was a flying chance in hell that I would sign up for another I ignored his email.

Enter: bright idea.

Do you ever have one of those "awesome ideas" that you're only kind of serious about pursuing?  Yes?  No?  I have them all. the. time.

I opened my email, and composed the following to trainer:

Subject: I have a proposition for you...
Message:  Find me a date and I'll join the 90-day challenge.

Crazy email?  Absolutely.
Slightly inappropriate?  Yup.

I'm a girl who has very little shame in my game; and while all a part of me WISHED he'd say he found a date, setup a time at a local coffee shop for us to me, only to find out it was HIM he set me up on a date with...I knew better.

He takes his job very seriously; I can tell he's in his element...and it's refreshing as hell (not to mention super sexy). 

His response to my inappropriate email was pretty clever; "dates?  no problem...if you go to the grocery store, just ask one of the clerks which aisle to look in, and you'll have dates for days.  can't wait to see you come in to start your next 90-day!"

Touche', Trainer...Touche.

After a bit of email banter back and forth, he finally admitted to "having a lead on a date, but I'd have to come in to hear more."

My instant-mom-gut-reaction was B.S.....but if I've learned anything in my 31 years on this planet, it's that life is too short to harbor on "what-ifs" so OF COURSE I marched my overweight arse into the gym to find out if my leg was being pulled.

And pulled it was.  The look of sheer disappointment poured from each and every cell on my body, so much so that even Trainer commented on my sad puppy dog eyes....and, yes, I signed up for the stupid challenge. 

Trainer - 1.  Me - 0. 

In sitting there chatting with him, I realized how much I actually did miss the gym (I know, right?).  I also realized that my Trainer was far more serious about keeping this a business relationship...but when he mentioned that he was a gun safety certified while we were shooting the breeze, I couldn't help but tell him he had to make up his fib about a date to me by taking me shooting (note: shooting a gun has been on my bucket list for a while...).

And what do ya know...HE TOOK THE BAIT! (that makes me sound a bit predatorish, I digress).

What do you think the over-under is that this non-date date will actually happen?